Jennifer and her sisters had a wonderful relationship with her mother. Their house was full of love, and full of music. Debbie was extraordinarily musical. She loved music, loved performance, loved dance, and had a beautiful singing voice. She used to make up songs in rhyme and was often asked by family and friends to help them create poems or poetic songs for special life events and occasions. All of her daughters claimed their mom as their best friend. The family was devastated when they learned of Debbie’s diagnosis.
Jennifer first knew Dr. Eisenberg as a friend. They met when she first moved to San Diego in 2002. Jennifer and her husband were about the same age as Steve and his wife, and both couples were starting their families. When Jennifer’s mom was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2004, she leaned on Steve for support and a better understanding of what her mom was facing. They would check in with each other regularly, and while he was not her doctor, Steve tracked Debbie’s health closely as a friend. One day when Jennifer and Steve were talking, he mentioned that he had started writing songs for some of his patients. Jennifer and her mom both loved the idea, and saw the opportunity as a gift.
Steve interviewed Jennifer to get ideas and content about Debbie and her life. Debbie loved butterflies—she saw them as free and beautiful, and used to say that if there was an afterlife, she’d like to come back as a butterfly. With Jennifer’s input, Steve wrote an original, beautiful song for Debbie called “I’m a Butterfly.” Steve performed it for Debbie in her home in the last few weeks of her life. At that point in her illness, she sometimes drifted in and out of sleep; however Jennifer could tell she was captivated by the song, and seemed to pick up the tune and hum along.
For Jennifer, being interviewed about her mom when Steve was creating the lyrics for “I’m a Butterfly” was very healing. It was a gift to Debbie and the whole family to have a song that honored Debbie’s life. Debbie passed away a few weeks after Jennifer and Steve wrote and performed the song. Now, when Debbie’s grandkids see butterflies, they tell their parents they saw “Granny the butterfly” that day.
Since her mother’s diagnosis, Jennifer has become a passionate advocate for breast cancer research. She organized an annual fundraising walk at her temple, Temple Emanu-El in San Diego to create solidarity among all people with or connected to breast cancer and to raise awareness and money for cancer research. The community walk has since been renamed The Debbie Berton Walk to pay tribute to Jennifer’s mom. Last year, at the 3rd annual walk, Jennifer asked Steve to play “I’m a Butterfly” in honor of Debbie.
